Just Ask Jeni-Ji: I Often Feel Angry With Myself. What Guidance Can You Give Me?
I often feel angry with myself and situations in my life, and more recently have been feeling unsatisfied with life. I have been questioning whether anything in my life is right for me. In reality, I am following my dream and feel grateful to be in this position. I also have a special man in my life. Sometimes I get angry and irritated with him. I often feel defensive and that he is attacking me - but he is not. I'm sure he is my soul mate and don’t want to end up pushing him away or running away from the relationship. I can't see clarity with anything: my career, my higher purpose, my relationship, my studies, etc. I know I need to practice more meditation, as it is a key factor to resolving my issue. What other guidance can you give me?
Hello Kayla and thank you for your questions!
What I am hearing from spirit is that you are and have been going through a major transformation and your soul has been bringing things to the surface. Things you need to heal and let go of, and this can bring up a lot of insecurities and the feeling as if you’re not on the right path in life. This can cause confusion. I am seeing you working with children as you are naturally gifted for it. Your experiences shape you into who you are meant to be. When you are irritated it creates havoc within your nervous system throwing you out of alignment with soul into fear.
Reflect back onto what you have been working towards and see where you are today and congratulate yourself for everything that you have accomplished. You will see there has been a big shift in consciousness and awareness within. There has been a lot of past traumas coming to the surface that need to be healed. I see this especially with family and relationships. You may find that there are certain events coming up that have had similar situations from 2004 and 2010.
Let go of the struggles and trust that everything is coming together.
Your current partner has been going through a major transformation as well and his life has been shaken up a lot, which has thrown him off course. Others have been telling him how he should live his life and this lead him to not listen to his soul speak. You both were struggling with trying to please everyone. You both must lead your lives in a way that works best for you and not live your life how others are telling you to. Rushing into marriage is not the way, and as you could both see things were not flowing. When things are flowing you know you are on the right path. As I read into your past life akashic records with each other you both had many struggles trying to please others and both of you seemed to live your lives according to what others wanted. You have come back into this lifetime with each other to live your life the way you both agree on, not by what others are telling you. I see your partner and you going back into another lifetime being medical students helping heal the smaller communities and villages in Africa and areas in Asia.
The struggles you are having with each other stem back to past trust issues with previous relationships that were karmic lessons. Building a solid relationship takes time and you must have an emotional connection with each other and be open with communication. Love does not hold a relationship together. We can love someone and yet know it is not enough. Holding back communicating from each other only creates more tension and issues. Be open and honest with what bothers you both and compromise with no judgement. We all have our ups and downs with relationships. I see marriage when you are both truly ready and family will be with you who are local. I see someone travelling to be with you who lives in a different country. Surrender it to divine timing and you will understand why the marriage plans did not happen before. There will be a child who you will really connect with who is from a different culture and it will make you think more of starting a family. I am also seeing your mother in spirit with you when you are in labor at the hospital. You could even dream about your mother when you are pregnant and that is her way to show you how you are still connected with her.
When you are in alignment with soul you will hear messages coming through more clearly. When you worry you create inbalance in your nervous system, and it will block you from new opportunities. When you change your story, you begin to change your life. Empower the greater truth of your being and stand in unity of gratitude. Be who you are. We all have our own unique gifts to share with others.
You have the power to shift your mind when you tune in and quiet the chaos. Align yourself with love, and place your hand over your heart and listen.
Where is your heart calling you? You have such a beautiful caring compassionate heart to heal and help others in such a huge way. Where are you pulled? Where do you see yourself? Take time out for you. Breakthrough any doubt, push through your comfort zone and your limitations. Let go of stress and see how that pushes you forward to manifest your dreams.
Spirit has been removing certain people from your life that you no longer connect with. Let go of what is ending and trust new beginnings. You have seen your real family and friends in times of difficulties. You have also seen the people who you used to relate to and how you no longer connect with them because you have been going through a massive awakening. Many people have shown you their true self of who they are, and this can be alarming but yet you’re not surprised. It only confirms how much you have shifted.
It’s time to set boundaries and think of you and focus on your dreams and aspirations.
You will find that May will be a fresh start for you, and you will feel more liberation and more secure. You may even be moving to a new location which you will really enjoy. You will meet new friends, of which some of them will be soul connected. There could be some delays in the process, be patient. You are very sensitive and can pick up on everyone’s energy, which can cause you to easily get drained. Just observe it and know that we all have our own journey to walk. Look back onto October 2021 to see what you were completing and what was ending. Be grateful for what lessons your soul taught you with gratitude.
Make sure that you are drinking more water to flush out the past toxic energy. Toxins can come into our body just by being around negative people and situations. Make sure you are also taking healthy daily vitamins and supplements. Your stress is depleting your immune system and also causes blockages within your chakras. Your studies will go fine when you focus on yourself and follow your passions. I even see new work opening for you that you will really enjoy love, so be open to the new. When you have obstacles, say “how do I get around this situation with ease?” What you do on a day-to-day basis determines your future. I keep hearing your dad say that he is very proud of you and your accomplishments. He is very much with you.
Stay anchored within the light of your soul and follow your truth to set your soul free.
Namaste
Jeni Ji
To have your question answered by Jeni Ji for her column ‘Just Ask Jeni Ji,’ send us an email: deidre@sfyogamag.com.
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